Subtle signs you shouldn’t ignore—and how to take the right next step.
The holiday season often brings adult children and extended family back together—sometimes for the first time in months. While reunions are filled with warmth and tradition, they can also shine a light on quiet changes in an aging parent’s health, behavior, or living environment.
If you’re visiting an older loved one this season, it’s worth paying attention to subtle physical, cognitive, and behavioral red flags that may signal it’s time for more support at home.
Signs to Look For: Physical and Behavioral Changes
Changes don’t always happen overnight. But when you’re away for a while, even gradual declines can become more noticeable. Keep an eye out for the following:
- Mobility issues: Is your loved one steady on their feet? Are they using furniture to balance, avoiding stairs, or hesitant to walk without support?
- Changes in personal hygiene: Have they bathed, brushed their hair, or changed clothes regularly?
- Weight loss or poor nutrition: Check the refrigerator and pantry—are they eating well-balanced meals or relying heavily on frozen or packaged food?
- Neglected home tasks: Look for unopened mail, unwashed dishes, or signs that bills may be going unpaid.
- Increased isolation: Have they stopped socializing, attending activities, or seeing friends?
- Mood shifts: Are they more anxious, withdrawn, or forgetful than usual?
What to Do if You Notice a Change
It can be difficult to know what to do next—especially when your loved one downplays the challenges or insists everything is fine. But early action makes a big difference.
Start by gently opening the conversation. Ask how they’re managing, what daily tasks feel difficult, or if they’ve considered extra help at home. You don’t need to have all the answers. Just being aware and involved is a powerful first step.
“As a trusted loved one, your intuition is critical and engaging in conversations about observed changes can be overwhelming. We are here to support you! Remember, there’s no ‘perfect’ way to have this conversation. Your goal is to be nonjudgmental and identify how tasks can be completed with greater ease. Try asking an open-ended question that invites your loved one to mentally explore alternatives to the way things are today and focus on an activity they want to continue engaging in or are finding difficult. ‘Could you imagine if you didn’t have to take the garbage out to the curb each week?’ or ‘Would cooking be more fun/easier if the ingredients were already in your kitchen?’”
— Laura Liesem, LCSW, Vice President of Home Care & Support Services
Support That Meets Your Family Where You Are
At Support at Home, we understand how personal this journey is. Our experienced team helps families create flexible, personalized care plans that support safety, independence, and dignity.
Whether your loved one needs a few hours of assistance a week or more ongoing support, we’ll guide you through every step of the process—from the initial consultation to personalized caregiver matching and beyond.
Not sure if your loved one needs help yet?
Our team at Support at Home is here to listen, assess, and help guide you toward the right support—whether it’s a few hours a week or something more consistent.
Call us directly or fill out a quick form to start the conversation: https://www.ioaging.org/homecare/
